Choices in Love

The words "Love is a Choice" has become the topic of many conversations this week. When something becomes a common theme in my life, my ears will open and I will try to listen for the purpose behind the words. "Love is a Choice" sounds so simple when said, and often if not "heard" can be ignored or thought of as another cliché. But for me, at this time in my life, it was brilliant poetry that seemed to resonate with where I had been, where I currently stand, and where I plan on going in life.

Choice is defined as the mental process of thinking, in addition to the process of judging the merits of multiple options and selecting one of them for action. Love is defined as a strong, positive emotion of regard and affection. If you read these two definitions, it is easy to begin to understand why "choosing to love" can be a conflict within a relationship, family, or within oneself. One word is defined by a mental process or working with logic, while the other is defined by an emotion or working with feelings. Can one's feelings ever be logical, or can logic ever explain feelings? It is no wonder why so many of us are confused and can't figure out how to make a "Choice to Love".

Happy Endings?

Tonight I watched the movie 27 Dresses. I'm starting to wonder when Hollywood is going to produce a movie that starts out with the little girl who dreams of her prince charming, gets married to her prince charming, soon finds out he is not her prince charming, gets divorced, is introduced back into single life, works hard, soon realizes that having what she thought was a dream career is not all it is cracked up to be, and then roams the world for happiness. I WANT to know what happens to this little girl!!!! By the way, I think Drew Barrymore would be the perfect actress to play the leading role.

I'm sure we will never see this movie in the theaters...Why would we? Most of us 30-something women are living this life right now and probably would not want to pay $10 to see our lives on the big screen. It would be like seeing the cottage cheese on the back of our thighs blown up 500%. What woman wants to see that???

So what's the compromise, because I can't bare to see one more movie that starts out where I think I can relate to the story and then the next thing you know I am hit with a sappy Happy Ending. But then at the same time, what person in their right mind will ever go to the theater and want to see my cottage cheese thighs blown up to 500%?

Maybe the compromise is just sticking to the good ole' classics...you know, the ones where there are monsters, aliens and people who die. This just seems so much more reasonable.

I'm Back!!!!

It looks like it has been about 6 months since I last wrote in this blog and of course it was a boy who took me away from my writing. Well, the boy is gone and I'm Back!!!

Of course I learned a lot in the last few months and I am learning a lot now - I always try to learn with every new experience, but with learning and growth there always seems to be more unanswered questions.

For instance: How come every time I feel as if I know and understand someone they shock or surprise me with the core fundamental make-up of who they are? Of course throughout getting to know someone, we all start to show our true colors at various paces. I can understand this. What I don't understand is when someone changes completely from night to day, within minute’s time, during a stressful situation, and you really see who they are as a human being. This is when I start to question people in general. And I'm sorry "boys", but it's mostly you this happens with. None of my girlfriends do this. It is boys I find can hide their true character for months on end, until one day a stressful situation just brings it out entirely. At that point you really see who they are first hand. Women do not do this. Women seem to lay it all out on the table almost right away. Some may say that women "show all their cards too soon" OR "they don't maintain a poker face", but by women doing this they have INTEGRITY, they are being HONEST, and they are TRUE TO THEMSELVES and OTHERS.

Although I'm sad, disappointed, and full of questions, I have learned one BIG lesson....next time I must fall in love with a MAN, not a "BOY".